Match Report

	(9) 19	-	(2) 5
We Play Like Girls				Grimthorpe Strikers
Division Pos:9				Division Pos:11

Goal Scorers
Player Name 814 4 (pen), 8, 20, 31, 39, 47, 54, 58, 74, 78, 90 Player Name 811 12, 27 Player Name 818 35 Player Name 803 43 Player Name 816 51 Player Name 807 66 Player Name 817 71 Player Name 810 83		Richard Cranium 6 Sam Manilla 21 Daryl Lect 50, 63, 78

Match Statistics

3 5 2	Formation	4 3 3 Attacking
30	Possession	70
19	Shots	17
10	Fouls	9
3	Yellow Cards	2
0	Red Cards	0
4	Offsides	8
Longball	Style	Passing
Attacking	Instruction	Counter Attack
Pansy	Aggression	Normal
Studded	Boots	Blades

Player Ratings

1	P.Name 802		32
2	P.Name 803	(89)	33
3	P.Name 806		30
4	P.Name 807	(89)	32
5	P.Name 811		29
6	P.Name 813	(66)	27
7	P.Name 816	(45)	30
8	P.Name 817		40
9	P.Name 818		26
10	P.Name 810		34
11	P.Name 814		33
12	P.Name 812	(66)	42
13	P.Name 804		0
14	P.Name 801		0
15	P.Name 815		0
16	P.Name 809		0

1	B.Early		0
2	A.Meway		0
3	B.Nessround	(66)	44
4	B.Dover	(33)	44
5	S.Freak		0
6	S.Manilla		47
7	R.Cranium		45
8	D.Pipes		48
9	D.Lect		48
10	J.Credible		0
11	B.Ding		0
12	D.Pipes		0
13	B.Arrow		0
14	D.Tater		0
15	C.Arm		0
16	M.Absent		0


Time	Person	Description
4 mins	Player Name 814	after ref awarded a penalty
6 mins	Richard Cranium	with a wonderful chip from 30 yards out
8 mins	Player Name 814	with a great chip from the left wing
12 mins	Player Name 811	with a lovely move from the right wing
16 mins	Player Name 814	scuffed a penalty
20 mins	Player Name 814	with an unbelievable shot from his own penalty area
21 mins	Sam Manilla	with a powerful header into the top corner
24 mins	Player Name 811	blasted a penalty into row z
27 mins	Player Name 811	with a subtle shot from just inside the penalty area
31 mins	Player Name 814	with a rocket from outside the penalty area
33 mins	Ben Dover	Time wasting
35 mins	Player Name 818	with a massive strike that gave the keeper no chance
36 mins	Richard Cranium	blasted a penalty into row z
39 mins	Player Name 814	with a header from the penalty area
43 mins	Player Name 803	after he sprung the offside trap leaving just the keeper to beat
45 mins	Player Name 816	Annoying the referee
47 mins	Player Name 814	with a stunning effort that went in off the post
50 mins	Daryl Lect	after he went through a non-existent gap leaving him with a clear shot
51 mins	Player Name 816	with an unbelievable shot from his own penalty area
54 mins	Player Name 814	with a dink right under the goalkeeper's nose
58 mins	Player Name 814	with a spectacular bicycle kick
62 mins	Player Name 807	blasted a penalty into row z
63 mins	Daryl Lect	after a pigeon distracted the keeper
66 mins	Bo Nessround	Shirt pulling
66 mins	Player Name 813	A mild concussion
66 mins	Player Name 807	with a massive strike that gave the keeper no chance
71 mins	Player Name 817	with a massive strike that gave the keeper no chance
74 mins	Player Name 814	with the hand of God
78 mins	Player Name 814	with a unstoppable effort from 20 yards out
78 mins	Daryl Lect	with a little side heel inside the six yard box
83 mins	Player Name 810	from a goal kick
87 mins	Player Name 814	scuffed a penalty
89 mins	Player Name 807	Fighting with fans
89 mins	Player Name 803	Fighting with fans
90 mins	Player Name 814	with a spectacular bicycle kick

Match Report

We Play Like Girls taught Grimthorpe Strikers a lesson they won't forget. By the end they were having trouble keeping track of the 19 goals scored against them. Maybe the lesson should have been maths.
Madubuko Chijioke needs his mind jogging. He needs to remember that's what his team should be doing. Jogging. He gives no attention to his increasingly chubby squad's training needs.
Marcus Absent was about to set off to the game when he discovered a racehorse in the back of his car. Turns out it was Shergar. He missed the game due to helping police with their enquiries.
We Play Like Girls manager Benny Fitt agreed to give Player Name 814 a tenner for every goal he scored. He doubled his wages with 11 goals.
We Play Like Girls's attacking game won out over Grimthorpe Strikers's counter play on the day. Their counters didn't count.
Player Name 807 and Player Name 803 picked a fight with the biggest guy in the crowd hoping Butch Gravelneck would end their embarrassment on the pitch. They both took a beating before Butch Gravelneck stepped in and, out of spite, only booked them.
After a clear-cut penalty was awarded, Grimthorpe Strikers's Richard Cranium sent the keeper the wrong way. Unfortunately, he sent the ball the wrong way too and the keeper saved it.
"I've been mugged!" grumbled Madubuko Chijioke after this defeat. The police weren't taking his claims seriously.
Despite all their Christmases coming at once, We Play Like Girls should still get a present. On the evidence of this one-sided contest a deckchair for their goalie might be nice.

Extra Information

Referee

Weather

Pitch

Butch Gravelneck

Rainy

Muddy Pitch