Match Report

	(1) 1	-	(4) 8
Club of the Century				BALDBEAN FC
Division Pos:13				Division Pos:11

Goal Scorers
Val Crow 21		First Team 8.11 9 First Team 10.45 18, 63, 80 First Team 9.45 34, 42, 89 First Team 10.01 74

Match Statistics

4 1 4 1	Formation	2 5 3
30	Possession	70
9	Shots	16
7	Fouls	12
0	Yellow Cards	1
0	Red Cards	0
1	Offsides	1
Continental	Style	Passing
Attacking	Instruction	Attacking
Pansy	Aggression	Normal
Studded	Boots	Moulded

Player Ratings

1	D.Sore	75
2	C.Needzit	64
3	V.Lay	75
4	B.Arrow	74
5	A.Sapple	62
6	E.Roids	74
7	B.Ding	83
8	E.Roids	75
9	P.Zaria	77
10	S.Dup	52
11	V.Crow	85
12	H.First	0
13	E.Jewcation	0
14	L.Stooth	0
15	L.Lyde	0
16	B.Early	0

1	F.Team 10.36		48
2	S.Team 10.02*	(1)	45
3	F.Team 8.11		61
4	S.Team 10.03	(1)	88
5	S.Team 10.24		89
6	S.Team 10.08	(1)	45
7	F.Team 10.30*		48
8	F.Team 9.20		87
9	F.Team 9.45		69
10	F.Team 10.01		48
11	F.Team 10.45		78
12	S.Team 10.33		0
13	V.Veeta		0
14	F.Team 9.16	(1)	85
15	F.Team 8.46*	(1) (67)	48
16	F.Team 9.24	(1)	83


Time	Person	Description
1 mins	BALDBEAN FC	changed from Attacking to Defensive
9 mins	First Team 8.11	after a pigeon distracted the keeper
15 mins	BALDBEAN FC	changed from Defensive to Attacking
18 mins	First Team 10.45	from a corner
21 mins	Val Crow	with a great volley from 10 yards out
26 mins	First Team 10.01	scuffed a penalty
34 mins	First Team 9.45	after a lovely one-two cut the defence in half
42 mins	First Team 9.45	with the bumcheek of God
45 mins	BALDBEAN FC	changed from Attacking to Defensive
63 mins	First Team 10.45	with a thunderous shot from distance
67 mins	First Team 8.46*	Obstruction
74 mins	First Team 10.01	with a spectacular bicycle kick
75 mins	BALDBEAN FC	changed from Defensive to Counter Attack
80 mins	First Team 10.45	with a belter from his own half
89 mins	First Team 9.45	after he sprung the offside trap leaving just the keeper to beat

Match Report

Club of the Century's 8 - 1 defeat against BALDBEAN FC left them hanging in this division by a thread. They must win their next game if they're to stand a chance of staying up.
The Club of the Century fans were calling for the head of manager Mo Soliman after this game. He at least knows where his head is, unlike his arse or elbow.
BALDBEAN FC had so much possession they only had to win the ball once all match - at kick off.
The highlight of the game was First Team 9.45 completing his hat trick after he sprung the offside trap leaving just the keeper to beat.
Club of the Century's midfield needs attention. They were making less successful passes than a flatulent, acne ridden geek with halitosis at a school disco.
There are less suitable formations for Club of the Century's squad than 4 1 4 1, but Mo Soliman would be advised to ignore those too.
"We should have won," bawled Mo Soliman after being outwitted by BALDBEAN FC's manager. "I didn't think it was possible to underestimate Raymond Clarke but I managed it."
With a mere 8 goals being the difference between the two sides, this wasn't so much a game of football as a successful target practice session for BALDBEAN FC.

Extra Information

Referee

Weather

Pitch

Wilmot Piddlethwaite

Hot

Normal Pitch