Match Report

	(0) 0	-	(7) 16
The Hammers				CSI-Broadstairs
Division Pos:4				Division Pos:1

Goal Scorers
		Elizabeth Shue* 6 (pen), 12, 17, 23, 28 (pen), 46, 57, 68 (pen), 73, 85 Louise Lombard 34, 40, 79 Sofia Ward 52 Kim Delany* 62, 90

Match Statistics

1 8 1	Formation	4 5 1
31	Possession	69
7	Shots	19
7	Fouls	5
1	Yellow Cards	1
0	Red Cards	0
2	Offsides	4
Passing	Style	Use Wings
Counter Attack	Instruction	Counter Attack
Pansy	Aggression	Pansy
Blades	Boots	Moulded

Player Ratings

1	M.Absent		71
2	E.Roids		72
3	O.Whackew		80
4	K.Cook		80
5	L.Sirr		80
6	K.Cook		78
7	P.Zaria		61
8	X.Money		63
9	E.Jewcation		68
10	S.Freak		66
11	H.Fire	(58)	71
12	B.Weiser		0
13	L.Nover		0
14	S.Pitt		0
15	D.Tater		0
16	K.Cook		0

1	P.Perrette	(1)	45
2	M.Kanakredes		87
3	E.Proctor	(1)	87
4	S.Ward	(76)	88
5	M.Helgenberger		87
6	E.La Rue	(1)	45
7	K.Delany***		89
8	L.Holly		88
9	J.Fox***		90
10	L.Lombard		91
11	E.Shue***		94
12	S.Alexander	(1)	82
13	S.Milos***	(1)	88
14	L.Vassey	(1)	88
15	M.Hartigay		0
16	J.Lyn Sigler		0


Time	Person	Description
6 mins	Elizabeth Shue***	after ref awarded a penalty
12 mins	Elizabeth Shue***	with a header from the penalty area
17 mins	Elizabeth Shue***	after he went through a non-existent gap leaving him with a clear shot
23 mins	Elizabeth Shue***	with a powerful header into the top corner
28 mins	Elizabeth Shue***	after ref awarded a penalty
34 mins	Louise Lombard	after the referee over-ruled the linesman when blatantly 30 yards offside
40 mins	Louise Lombard	after a pigeon distracted the keeper
46 mins	Elizabeth Shue***	from the dressing room
52 mins	Sofia Ward	with a powerful header into the top corner
57 mins	Elizabeth Shue***	with a rocket from outside the penalty area
58 mins	Harrison Fire	Unsporting behaviour
62 mins	Kim Delany***	with a powerful header into the top corner
68 mins	Elizabeth Shue***	after ref awarded a penalty
73 mins	Elizabeth Shue***	after he beat the offside trap and went one-on-one with the keeper
76 mins	Sofia Ward	Time wasting
79 mins	Louise Lombard	after the referee over-ruled the linesman when blatantly 30 yards offside
85 mins	Elizabeth Shue***	after the referee over-ruled the linesman when blatantly 30 yards offside
90 mins	Kim Delany***	from a throw in

Match Report

The Hammers will just want to go home and forget this astonishing 16 - 0 thumping by a CSI-Broadstairs side who just don't know when to stop. Maybe they could have spared their blushes if they just stayed at home in the first place.
Brian Gilbert is starting to look like The Pied Piper, his inspirational coaching sees the CSI-Broadstairs team following his every instruction and dancing to his tune.
Where ever CSI-Broadstairs went so did the ball. It was like Mary and her little lamb out there.
They shoot, they never stood a chance of scoring against CSI-Broadstairs keeper Sasha Alexander.
After today Jamie Harber cannot defend his team. And neither, obviously, could his defence.
The Hammers's Jamie Harber experiment with the 1 8 1 formation is not giving the results he wanted. Maybe he should change it before it blows up in his face.
"Brian Gilbert is a genius!" agreed a pair of CSI-Broadstairs fans in the snug of the local boozer after today's victory. "He should win the Nobel Prize for football management, he's a footballing Einstein and knows the winning formula. Even with that bunch!"
CSI-Broadstairs should be ashamed of themselves. Beating The Hammers 16 - 0 was a bit like mugging a granny for her pension. Both are equally defenceless.

Extra Information

Referee

Weather

Pitch

Simon Pieman

Windy

Soft Pitch