Match Report

	(5) 9	-	(2) 4
Glanford Park				Sporting Kansas City
Division Pos:16				Division Pos:14

Goal Scorers
Herbie Voor 7, 44, 54, 81 Chad Terbocks 17, 35 Telly Vision 25, 64, 72		Carl Arm 19, 36, 74 Stu Pitt 55

Match Statistics

4 3 3 Attacking	Formation	3 5 2 Attacking
48	Possession	52
10	Shots	13
6	Fouls	6
1	Yellow Cards	1
0	Red Cards	0
4	Offsides	7
Passing	Style	Use Wings
Defensive	Instruction	Counter Attack
Pansy	Aggression	Pansy
Astros	Boots	Studded

Player Ratings

1	J.King		87
2	T.Burr		77
3	B.Early		80
4	M.Rohsopht		81
5	W.Piece	(60)	47
6	D.Tater		81
7	R.Ingleaves		87
8	K.Opener		81
9	T.Vision		90
10	H.Voor		91
11	C.Terbocks		89
12	L.Lyde		0
13	X.Breath		0
14	W.Piece		0
15	C.Mass		0
16	M.Labor		0

1	D.Lesgettham		80
2	S.Down		69
3	T.Vision		73
4	W.Melon		71
5	A.Birthday		75
6	K.Opener		77
7	A.Structible	(60)	66
8	B.Ding		57
9	S.Pitt		47
10	L.Lyde		81
11	C.Arm		90
12	D.Druff		0
13	U.Daway		0
14	W.Deer		0
15	D.Lesgettham		0
16	L.Briccant		0


Time	Person	Description
7 mins	Herbie Voor	from a goal kick
17 mins	Chad Terbocks	with a cheeky dink through the keeper's legs
19 mins	Carl Arm	after he beat the offside trap and went one-on-one with the keeper
25 mins	Telly Vision	with a dink right under the goalkeeper's nose
35 mins	Chad Terbocks	with a spectacular bicycle kick
36 mins	Carl Arm	after the referee over-ruled the linesman when blatantly 30 yards offside
44 mins	Herbie Voor	with a dink right on the goal line
54 mins	Herbie Voor	with a little side heel inside the six yard box
55 mins	Stu Pitt	with the bumcheek of God
60 mins	Warren Piece	Repeated fouling
60 mins	Andy Structible	Head butting
64 mins	Telly Vision	with a belter from his own half
72 mins	Telly Vision	from a throw in
74 mins	Carl Arm	with a strike from the left wing
81 mins	Herbie Voor	with an amazing lob from an acute angle

Match Report

Sporting Kansas City were fleeced 9 - 4 by a rampant Glanford Park team who threw everything at them, including the goalposts and the ref.
It's not just weights Sporting Kansas City needs to lift. Their manager needs to lift their spirits in training too. He could start by tinkering with the Jogging practice.
With 1 players missing from the team, it was a miracle Glanford Park took the points. Jesus was spotted leaving just before the final whistle.
With 4 goals to his name, Herbie Voor performance was so impressive he got out of washing the kit after the match.
Sporting Kansas City's midfield needs attention. They were making less successful passes than a flatulent, acne ridden geek with halitosis at a school disco.
Like getting your plumber to do the gardening, Glanford Park's Noel Stephens is wasting a lot of potential by insisting on a 4 3 3 Attacking formation.
"That was a great win for us today," puffed manager Noel Stephens after the match. "What makes this game so delightful is that when both teams get the ball they are attacking their opponent's goal."
This is a result Sporting Kansas City could well have done without. Any more slip ups like this and they soon find themselves on the crest of a slump.

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