Match Report

	(6) 11	-	(0) 1
Nuckingfuts				Green Shield Tornadoes
Division Pos:9				Division Pos:16

Goal Scorers
Dick Tater 4 (pen), 12, 24, 30, 54, 58, 78, 85 Bowen Arrow 18, 49 Huang Annsaw 36		Sam Pull 87

Match Statistics

Diamond	Formation	1 8 1
70	Possession	30
20	Shots	4
6	Fouls	8
1	Yellow Cards	0
0	Red Cards	0
2	Offsides	0
Passing	Style	Longball
Attacking	Instruction	Defensive
Pansy	Aggression	Pansy
Moulded	Boots	Blades

Player Ratings

1	W.Bago		88
2	R.Sance	(90)	70
3	M.DeLawn		81
4	B.Crobbery	(90)	74
5	V.Crow		59
6	A.Nino		80
7	S.Pull		71
8	H.Annsaw		88
9	V.Tire		67
10	D.Tater		89
11	B.Arrow		77
12	V.Crow		0
13	B.Crobbery	(90)	47
14	M.Rohsopht		0
15	V.Lay		0
16	J.King		0

1	O.Whackew		75
2	S.Dup		77
3	J.Czarfunee		81
4	W.Melon		60
5	V.Crow	(90)	48
6	V.Tire		58
7	B.Ender		48
8	E.Jewcation		62
9	S.Pull		70
10	B.Ding		61
11	A.Tricity		48
12	B.Board		0
13	A.Birthday		0
14	S.Pull		0
15	L.DeHand		0
16	R.Kleiner	(90)	45


Time	Person	Description
4 mins	Dick Tater	after ref awarded a penalty
12 mins	Dick Tater	with a unstoppable effort from 20 yards out
18 mins	Bowen Arrow	after a dog ran on pitch and put the ball into the net
24 mins	Dick Tater	with a brave flying header
30 mins	Dick Tater	with a wonderful chip from 30 yards out
36 mins	Huang Annsaw	with a massive strike that gave the keeper no chance
49 mins	Bowen Arrow	with a dink right on the goal line
54 mins	Dick Tater	with an amazing lob from an acute angle
58 mins	Dick Tater	with a belter from the halfway line
78 mins	Dick Tater	with a shot which ricocheted in off the crossbar
85 mins	Dick Tater	from a throw in
87 mins	Sam Pull	with a wonderful chip from 30 yards out
90 mins	Ben Crobbery	Repeated diving
90 mins	Val Crow	A mild concussion
90 mins	Renee Sance	A mild concussion

Match Report

Green Shield Tornadoes were taught a real lesson here by a rampant Nuckingfuts side. So heavy was the 11 - 1 defeat that by the end they were having trouble keeping track of score. Maybe the lesson should have been maths.
The Green Shield Tornadoes fans were calling for the head of manager Billy Hopwood after this game. He at least knows where his head is, unlike his arse or elbow.
Val Lay was about to set off to the game when he discovered a racehorse in the back of his car. Turns out it was Shergar. He missed the game due to helping police with their enquiries.
Green Shield Tornadoes are the kind of side who take no prisoners. After his performance between the sticks, keeper Otto Whackew should be locked up.
The Nuckingfuts attack simple bulldozed their way through the Green Shield Tornadoes defence. A demolition job.
There are less suitable formations for Nuckingfuts's squad than Diamond, but dot dash would be advised to ignore those too.
Green Shield Tornadoes manager Billy Hopwood told irate fans: "If it wasn't for their goals, Nuckingfuts wouldn't have won."
As if getting beaten by almost a cricket score wasn't enough for Green Shield Tornadoes to sort their act out, maybe being a laughing stock will.

Extra Information

Referee

Weather

Pitch

Wilmot Piddlethwaite

Hot

Normal Pitch