Match Report

	(10) 18	-	(0) 0
Purple Gelato				evil pixie fc
Division Pos:4				Division Pos:15

Goal Scorers
Ollie Watkins 745 8, 13, 25, 29, 49 Kobbie Mainoo* 816 17 Bukayo Saka 777 22, 37, 53, 71, 88 Declan Rice 821 33 (pen), 41 (pen), 57 (pen), 62 (pen) Harry Kane* 778 45, 66 Ben Crobbery 84 (og)

Match Statistics

2 5 3	Formation	4 3 3 Attacking
65	Possession	35
20	Shots	9
3	Fouls	16
1	Yellow Cards	0
0	Red Cards	0
4	Offsides	2
Continental	Style	Longball
Attacking	Instruction	Counter Attack
Normal	Aggression	Normal
Moulded	Boots	Studded

Player Ratings

1	J.Pickford 633		88
2	T.Alex-Arnold 811		76
3	L.Dunk 838	(1)	81
4	J.Bellingham* 824		89
5	C.Palmer 784	(1)	45
6	D.Rice 821	(90)	92
7	K.Mainoo* 816		88
8	P.Foden 796		90
9	B.Saka 777		93
10	I.Toney 757	(1)	45
11	O.Watkins 745		92
12	A.Ramsdale 584		0
13	E.Konsa 763	(1)	88
14	E.Eze 737	(1)	88
15	A.Gordon 821		0
16	H.Kane* 778	(1)	88

1	A.Tricity	79
2	B.Crobbery	62
3	D.Pipes	77
4	B.Board	0
5	T.Burr	79
6	J.Czarfunee	75
7	M.Rohsopht	68
8	J.Case	76
9	J.Frayed	0
10	J.Credible	81
11	B.Dover	82
12	S.Knot	0
13	A.Choke	0
14	T.Vision	0
15	V.Lay	0
16	V.Crow	0


Time	Person	Description
1 mins	Purple Gelato	changed from Normal to Nutter
1 mins	Purple Gelato	changed from Attacking to Defensive
8 mins	Ollie Watkins 745	with a thunderous shot from distance
13 mins	Ollie Watkins 745	with a scissor kick on the edge of the box
17 mins	Kobbie Mainoo* 816	with a belter from his own half
22 mins	Bukayo Saka 777	with a powerful header into the top corner
25 mins	Ollie Watkins 745	with a great volley from 10 yards out
29 mins	Ollie Watkins 745	with a dink right under the goalkeeper's nose
30 mins	evil pixie fc	changed from Counter Attack to Attacking
30 mins	Purple Gelato	changed from Defensive to Counter Attack
33 mins	Declan Rice 821	after ref awarded a penalty
37 mins	Bukayo Saka 777	after a lovely one-two cut the defence in half
41 mins	Declan Rice 821	after ref awarded a penalty
45 mins	Harry Kane* 778	after the referee over-ruled the linesman when blatantly 30 yards offside
49 mins	Ollie Watkins 745	with pin-point accuracy into the far corner
50 mins	Trent Alex-Arnold 811	A broken finger
53 mins	Bukayo Saka 777	with a belter from his own half
57 mins	Declan Rice 821	after ref awarded a penalty
62 mins	Declan Rice 821	after ref awarded a penalty
66 mins	Harry Kane* 778	with a dink right under the goalkeeper's nose
71 mins	Bukayo Saka 777	after a pigeon distracted the keeper
84 mins	Ben Crobbery	after a shot took a cruel deflection off him
88 mins	Bukayo Saka 777	with a scissor kick on the edge of the box
90 mins	Declan Rice 821	High kicking

Match Report

Purple Gelato were on blazing form as they torched evil pixie fc 18 - 0.
kevin ward would be as well giving his squad singing lessons for all the good the Corners training seems to be doing them.
Telly Vision was absent because he'd just had Sky installed and couldn't tear himself away from a fascinating documentary about whale sex.
Quite why evil pixie fc's Ben Crobbery had his shorts on his head and the ball tucked up his shirt when he fell over his own goal line remains a mystery. Mafia interference is the most probable explanation.
This result reads more like a tennis score than football. evil pixie fc's defence would have faired better if they'd played the second half with tennis rackets. They were the pits.
Most of evil pixie fc clearly thought 4 3 3 Attacking was the boss' phone number. Why else did they ignore his formation instructions.
"How we lost that I'll never know," huffed kevin ward. "We must have had 99 per cent of the game. It was the other three per cent that cost us the match."
Even if this was a game of rugby, evil pixie fc wouldn't have been able to compete due to their lack of trying.

Extra Information

Referee

Weather

Pitch

Billy Bludgeon

Hot

Normal Pitch