Match Report

	(14) 26	-	(2) 3
Screaming Vengeance				slisdead
Division Pos:10				Division Pos:15

Goal Scorers
Fletcher Bisceps 3, 16, 25, 35, 41, 44, 51, 60 Robin Meeblind 6 (pen), 9 (pen), 70 (pen) Winnie Dipoo 12, 22, 29, 38, 67, 77, 80, 84, 90 Jim Nasium 19, 48 Mike Rohsopht 32 Lou Briccant 54, 57 Andy Gravity 87		Player Name 16116 20 Player Name 16118 39 Player Name 16110 76

Match Statistics

2 3 2 1 2	Formation	Sweeper
62	Possession	38
26	Shots	10
6	Fouls	11
1	Yellow Cards	2
0	Red Cards	0
4	Offsides	2
Use Wings	Style	Longball
Counter Attack	Instruction	Attacking
Pansy	Aggression	Normal
Astros	Boots	Moulded

Player Ratings

1	R.Meeblind		81
2	M.Rohsopht		88
3	J.Nasium		88
4	E.Jewcation		69
5	X.Breath		75
6	L.DeHand		71
7	E.Roids	(90)	89
8	A.Gravity		79
9	L.Briccant		68
10	W.Dipoo		82
11	F.Bisceps		90
12	H.Fire		0
13	J.Credible		0
14	L.Sirr		0
15	M.Absent		0
16	A.Tricity		0

1	P.Name 16102		45
2	P.Name 16103		0
3	P.Name 16106		40
4	P.Name 16107		52
5	P.Name 16111		45
6	P.Name 16113		46
7	P.Name 16116		48
8	P.Name 16117		0
9	P.Name 16118		49
10	P.Name 16110	(80)	53
11	P.Name 16114	(39)	48
12	P.Name 16112		0
13	P.Name 16104		0
14	P.Name 16101		0
15	P.Name 16115		0
16	P.Name 16109		0


Time	Person	Description
3 mins	Fletcher Bisceps	after he sprung the offside trap leaving just the keeper to beat
6 mins	Robin Meeblind	after ref awarded a penalty
9 mins	Robin Meeblind	after ref awarded a penalty
12 mins	Winnie Dipoo	with a spectacular bicycle kick
16 mins	Fletcher Bisceps	with a lucky shot that just sneaked inside the post
19 mins	Jim Nasium	with the hand of God
20 mins	Player Name 16116	after he sprung the offside trap leaving just the keeper to beat
22 mins	Winnie Dipoo	with a belter from his own half
25 mins	Fletcher Bisceps	from the dressing room
29 mins	Winnie Dipoo	after the referee over-ruled the linesman when blatantly 30 yards offside
32 mins	Mike Rohsopht	with a powerful header into the top corner
35 mins	Fletcher Bisceps	with a lovely move from the right wing
38 mins	Winnie Dipoo	with a belter from the halfway line
39 mins	Player Name 16114	Faking injury
39 mins	Player Name 16118	after he sprung the offside trap leaving just the keeper to beat
41 mins	Fletcher Bisceps	with a great solo effort
44 mins	Fletcher Bisceps	with a unstoppable effort from 20 yards out
48 mins	Jim Nasium	with a unstoppable effort from 20 yards out
51 mins	Fletcher Bisceps	with a lucky shot that just sneaked inside the post
54 mins	Lou Briccant	from the dressing room
57 mins	Lou Briccant	with a massive strike that gave the keeper no chance
58 mins	Player Name 16114	scuffed a penalty
60 mins	Fletcher Bisceps	with a little side heel inside the six yard box
67 mins	Winnie Dipoo	with a rocket from outside the penalty area
70 mins	Robin Meeblind	after ref awarded a penalty
76 mins	Player Name 16110	from a corner
77 mins	Winnie Dipoo	with pin-point accuracy into the far corner
80 mins	Player Name 16110	Head butting
80 mins	Winnie Dipoo	with a belter from the halfway line
84 mins	Winnie Dipoo	after a pigeon distracted the keeper
87 mins	Andy Gravity	from a free kick
90 mins	Emma Roids	High kicking
90 mins	Winnie Dipoo	with a cheeky dink through the keeper's legs

Match Report

After a performance this poor slisdead don't deserve to even be on the same pitch as the vastly superior Screaming Vengeance. The 26 - 3 beating they took suggests they weren't actually on the same pitch.
Jose Matos clearly thinks his team are the most skilled and highly tuned squad around. Why else would training be abandoned like an unwanted puppy?
slisdead's Player Name 16117 missed the match because his alarm clock was broken. It woke him up at the usual time and he turned it off with a hammer.
slisdead could save themselves some money next season by not bothering with a goalkeeper. They'd save a fortune on pies alone.
Crop circle investigators don't get too excited, it's just Screaming Vengeance's forwards. They ran rings around slisdead's defence.
Screaming Vengeance's Gavin Stewart is clearly deeply in love with 2 3 2 1 2. His team however can't stand it. A trial seperation must be in order.
"What we saw out there today," explained manager Jose Matos, "was a continuance of what we have seen most of the season - that is, various clubs beating each other."
At the end of the day, you get the feeling the damage could have been a lot worse. And if this is a Screaming Vengeance side not yet playing at full tilt, the rest of the division better beware.

Extra Information

Referee

Weather

Pitch

Lewis Lummox

Hot

Hard Pitch