Match Report

	(5) 11	-	(1) 2
Flitwick Felons				Tiptop Warriors
Division Pos:4				Division Pos:8

Goal Scorers
Adam Meway 4, 31, 48, 71 Moussa Dembele XI 12 Harry Kane 20, 25, 53, 82 (pen) Telly Vision 59, 76		Rose West 22 Fred West 66

Match Statistics

4 4 2	Formation	4 4 2 Attacking
65	Possession	35
12	Shots	9
9	Fouls	30
3	Yellow Cards	7
1	Red Cards	4
6	Offsides	3
Passing	Style	Passing
Counter Attack	Instruction	Attacking
Normal	Aggression	Normal
Studded	Boots	Astros

Player Ratings

1	J.Strap		43
2	M.Tarrico		47
3	T.King Xi	(60) (41)	47
4	A.Hugnkiss	(62,83)	46
5	D.Rose XI		47
6	T.Vision		47
7	M.Dembele XI		48
8	A.Hassle	(60)	45
9	G.Biz XI	(7)	44
10	H.Kane		48
11	A.Meway		48
12	P.Robbo XI		0
13	G.Mabutt XI	(60)	48
14	J.Credible	(60) (73)	46
15	D.Ginola XI		0
16	F.Furter	(7)	46

1	J.Ripper	(73)	45
2	A.Fish		0
3	P.Lopez	(33,38)	47
4	J.Dahmer	(7,21)	45
5	R.Meeblind		0
6	J.Fritzel	(62)	46
7	C.Chi-Tat Ng		47
8	W.Piece	(14)	46
9	C.Manson	(47,83)	48
10	R.West	(27,68)	47
11	F.West	(55)	48
12	D.Nilsen	(73)	47
13	J.Pomeroy		0
14	W.Gacy		0
15	E.Kemper		0
16	M.Hindley		0


Time	Person	Description
1 mins	Tiptop Warriors	changed from Normal to Psycho
4 mins	Adam Meway	after he sprung the offside trap leaving just the keeper to beat
7 mins	Jeffrey Dahmer	Repeated diving
7 mins	Gee Biz XI	A mild concussion
12 mins	Moussa Dembele XI	with an unbelievable shot from his own penalty area
14 mins	Warren Piece	No apparent reason
20 mins	Harry Kane	with a shot which ricocheted in off the crossbar
21 mins	Jeffrey Dahmer	Shirt pulling
22 mins	Rose West	with a scissor kick on the edge of the box
25 mins	Harry Kane	with a stunning effort that went in off the post
27 mins	Rose West	Annoying the referee
31 mins	Adam Meway	with a dink right under the goalkeeper's nose
33 mins	Pedro Lopez	Obstruction
38 mins	Pedro Lopez	Faking injury
41 mins	The King Xi	Time wasting
42 mins	Harry Kane	scuffed a penalty
47 mins	Charles Manson	Faking injury
48 mins	Adam Meway	with a little side heel inside the six yard box
53 mins	Harry Kane	after he beat the offside trap and went one-on-one with the keeper
55 mins	Fred West	Time wasting
59 mins	Telly Vision	with a lucky rebound off the keeper
60 mins	Flitwick Felons	changed from Passing to Continental
60 mins	Flitwick Felons	changed from Counter Attack to Defensive
62 mins	Josef Fritzel	Head butting
62 mins	Amanda Hugnkiss	Head butting
66 mins	Fred West	with a belter from the halfway line
68 mins	Rose West	Indecent exposure
68 mins	Amanda Hugnkiss	A mild concussion
71 mins	Adam Meway	from a free kick
72 mins	Harry Kane	A mild concussion
73 mins	Justin Credible	Faking injury
73 mins	Jack Ripper	A bruised shoulder
76 mins	Telly Vision	with a dink right on the goal line
82 mins	Harry Kane	after ref awarded a penalty
83 mins	Charles Manson	Head butting
83 mins	Amanda Hugnkiss	Head butting

Match Report

This was an encounter so uneven Flitwick Felons should have taken to the pitch wearing crampons rather than football boots. The result wouldn't have been too far off this 11 - 2 whipping even if they did.
At least William Coomber is saving the fans some money - he's been crossed off all their Christmas card lists after his recent coaching performances.
Flitwick Felons rang rings around Tiptop Warriors. And they took the ball with them every time.
With a performance like this, Tiptop Warriors's Dennis Nilsen gives crap keepers everywhere a good name.
Tiptop Warriors need to reassess they're attack. Their forwards are going nowhere. And slowly.
The ref booked a total of 15 players after seeing more studs in 90 minutes than you'd find on a Monte Carlo beach.
Josef Fritzel and Amanda Hugnkiss were both shown the yellow card when they decided to settle an argument with their heads.
The match was abandoned after 83 minutes due to a lack of players, the final score stands.
A grinning Gee Biz XI told the press: "Christopher ekins has the Midas touch at the moment. He's responsible for our golden performances."
You can talk about damage limitation all you like. When you've shipped 11 goals the only thing that's going to save you from a team like Flitwick Felons is the final whistle.

Extra Information

Referee

Weather

Pitch

Brian Blinker

Hot

Normal Pitch