Match Report

	(0) 0	-	(12) 22
I N T E R Milan				Red Stars
Division Pos:14				Division Pos:5

Goal Scorers
		Abbie Birthday 4 (pen), 7, 15, 18, 22, 25, 29, 52 (pen), 59, 70 (pen), 78, 85 (pen), 88 (pen) Al Kaholic 11, 33, 63 Ryan Brewster 37, 40, 67, 81 Vlad Tire 44, 55

Match Statistics

Sweeper	Formation	4 1 2 3
29	Possession	71
9	Shots	22
7	Fouls	11
2	Yellow Cards	3
0	Red Cards	0
2	Offsides	5
Continental	Style	Longball
Attacking	Instruction	Counter Attack
Pansy	Aggression	Normal
Blades	Boots	Moulded

Player Ratings

1	W.Deer		76
2	B.Weiser		72
3	A.Kaseltzer		67
4	L.Lyde		71
5	M.Well	(60)	72
6	E.Whatarmy		67
7	L.Stooth		45
8	D.Pipes		80
9	J.Credible	(31)	51
10	K.Dewitt		84
11	M.DeLawn	(90)	75
12	T.Burr		0
13	W.Dipoo		0
14	H.deMann		0
15	C.Mass	(31)	64
16	D.Tater		0

1	M.Cooper		88
2	M.DeLawn		87
3	E.Ible		89
4	L.DeHand		89
5	L.Briccant	(90)	87
6	J.Rak-Sakyi		88
7	S.Freak		88
8	V.Tire	(31)	89
9	A.Kaholic	(63)	91
10	A.Birthday		94
11	R.Brewster		92
12	R.Ingleaves		0
13	T.Chong		0
14	A.Rudder		0
15	W.Bago		0
16	N.Ovtime		0


Time	Person	Description
4 mins	Abbie Birthday	after ref awarded a penalty
7 mins	Abbie Birthday	with a flick on
11 mins	Al Kaholic	with a great chip from the left wing
15 mins	Abbie Birthday	with a stunning effort that went in off the post
18 mins	Abbie Birthday	after he went through a non-existent gap leaving him with a clear shot
22 mins	Abbie Birthday	after a pigeon distracted the keeper
25 mins	Abbie Birthday	with pin-point accuracy into the far corner
29 mins	Abbie Birthday	with a unstoppable effort from 20 yards out
31 mins	Vlad Tire	Indecent exposure
31 mins	Justin Credible	A mild concussion
33 mins	Al Kaholic	from a corner
37 mins	Ryan Brewster	with a great volley from 10 yards out
40 mins	Ryan Brewster	with a great solo effort
44 mins	Vlad Tire	with a wonderful chip from 30 yards out
52 mins	Abbie Birthday	after ref awarded a penalty
55 mins	Vlad Tire	with a strike from the left wing
59 mins	Abbie Birthday	with pin-point accuracy into the far corner
60 mins	Midas Well	Shirt pulling
63 mins	Al Kaholic	Time wasting
63 mins	Al Kaholic	with a strike from the left wing
67 mins	Ryan Brewster	with a belter from the halfway line
70 mins	Abbie Birthday	after ref awarded a penalty
78 mins	Abbie Birthday	from a goal kick
81 mins	Ryan Brewster	after he beat the offside trap and went one-on-one with the keeper
85 mins	Abbie Birthday	after ref awarded a penalty
88 mins	Abbie Birthday	after ref awarded a penalty
90 mins	Lou Briccant	Foul and abusive language
90 mins	Moe DeLawn	Foul and abusive language

Match Report

I N T E R Milan will just want to go home and forget this astonishing 22 - 0 thumping by a Red Stars side who just don't know when to stop. Maybe they could have spared their blushes if they just stayed at home in the first place.
Some idiot seems to have decided that only Defence will turn round the fortunes of I N T E R Milan. That idiot is Walter MAZZARRI.
Dick Tater didn't show up for I N T E R Milan because he couldn't find his favourite pants and can't play properly without a lacy pair of knickers under his shorts.
After clean sheet number 7 for Red Stars goalie Michael Cooper, it was kisses all round in the dressing room. No tongues though, that's disgusting.
An incredible display by Red Stars's midfield. They were like a moron on Mastermind. Pass. Pass. Pass. Pass…
Lou Briccant and Moe DeLawn had a name-calling session that earned them both a yellow card.
Most of I N T E R Milan clearly thought Sweeper was the boss' phone number. Why else did they ignore his formation instructions.
"The gaffer got it right tactically," commented Ryan Brewster, "We can win The Division on this kind of form unless someone beats us."
No one likes to see their team take such a savage beating. Maybe it's why the I N T E R Milan supporters decided to leave their specs at home.

Extra Information

Referee

Weather

Pitch

Albert Boneshaker

Rainy

Soft Pitch