Match Report

	(5) 11	-	(0) 3
Cheltenham Festival				Dudley Delights
Division Pos:12				Division Pos:4

Goal Scorers
Warren Piece 6, 30, 62, 78 Chanda Lear 14, 54 Chad Terbocks 22, 46 Ulee Daway 38 Midas Well 70, 85		Joe King 46 (pen) Xavier Money 62 Ed Jewcation 77

Match Statistics

5 2 3	Formation	2 3 2 1 2
68	Possession	32
17	Shots	9
8	Fouls	3
2	Yellow Cards	1
0	Red Cards	0
5	Offsides	2
Passing	Style	Continental
Counter Attack	Instruction	Attacking
Pansy	Aggression	Pansy
Studded	Boots	Astros

Player Ratings

1	B.Dwyer		85
2	S.Night		84
3	C.Lear		79
4	B.Crobbery	(61)	76
5	T.Urchips	(61)	74
6	H.Fire		58
7	U.Daway		79
8	C.Terbocks		82
9	M.Well		49
10	W.Piece		92
11	C.Terbocks		81
12	S.Knot		0
13	A.Choke		0
14	B.Board		0
15	K.Opener		0
16	X.Money		0

1	J.King		72
2	T.Vision		67
3	A.Thetires	(90)	44
4	S.Urai		44
5	R.Kleiner		58
6	B.Ding		52
7	J.King		87
8	A.Sapple		71
9	J.Frayed	(61)	57
10	X.Money		48
11	E.Jewcation		74
12	L.Nover	(61)	64
13	A.Sapple		0
14	X.Breath		0
15	D.Lesgettham		0
16	H.First		0


Time	Person	Description
6 mins	Warren Piece	with a belter from the halfway line
14 mins	Chanda Lear	with a powerful header into the top corner
16 mins	Ed Jewcation	blasted a penalty into row z
22 mins	Chad Terbocks	after a lovely one-two cut the defence in half
30 mins	Warren Piece	after a pigeon distracted the keeper
31 mins	Xavier Money	scuffed a penalty
38 mins	Ulee Daway	from a goal kick
46 mins	Chad Terbocks	with a spectacular bicycle kick
46 mins	Joe King	after ref awarded a penalty
54 mins	Chanda Lear	with a belter from the halfway line
61 mins	Ben Crobbery	Stealing
61 mins	Tate Urchips	Stealing
61 mins	Jose Frayed	A broken leg
62 mins	Warren Piece	with a brave flying header
62 mins	Xavier Money	with a powerful header into the top corner
70 mins	Midas Well	with a brave flying header
77 mins	Ed Jewcation	with a cheeky dink through the keeper's legs
78 mins	Warren Piece	with the hand of God
85 mins	Midas Well	from a corner
90 mins	Aaron Thetires	Time wasting

Match Report

There's only one word for what happened to Dudley Delights here. They were mauled, well and truly. How else can you describe being beaten 11 - 3? That's not losing, losing would suggest they competed in some way.
Daniel Cullen, eh? What a manager. Played this victory to tactical perfection. Can he keep it up for the rest of the season? We'll see.
Dudley Delights's Hugo First missed the game after the vicar at his local church insisted he stop for a chat and a cup of tea after the service.
The goalkeeper's trade is a lonely one. Dudley Delights's Joe King is going to be shunned by his team mates, making him feel especially lonely, after this shocking performance.
You could give Cheltenham Festival 's defence bearskin hats and stand them in a box outside Buckingham Palace. On current form they'd defend anything.
2 Cheltenham Festival players were booked after Michael McLintock discovered they'd stolen the oppositions half time oranges.
There are less suitable formations for Cheltenham Festival 's squad than 5 2 3, but Daniel Cullen would be advised to ignore those too.
"In all honesty, it was a game we should have won," claimed manager David Millington-Marsh. "We lost it because we thought we were going to win it. But then again, I thought that there was no way we were going to get a result."
Dudley Delights call themselves a football team? They might call themselves one, after a display like this no one else is in a hurry to.

Extra Information

Referee

Weather

Pitch

Michael McLintock

Hot

Normal Pitch